We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
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