kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
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