theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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