the day after is always just damage control
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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