The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Randomize
