If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
