and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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