She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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