The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
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