i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
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