Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
