so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
