The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Randomize
