it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Randomize
