well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Randomize
