Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
