I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
My liver just broke up with me...
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
