turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
No more Irish car bombs ever.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
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