idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize