Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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