This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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