it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize