i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Randomize
