you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
