Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize
