It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize