There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
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