So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
