She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Randomize
