you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize