you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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