Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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