when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize