To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Randomize
