White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
