I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
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