So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
