Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
