I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
