"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize
