I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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