she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize
