i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
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