yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
pop tarts are not kleenex
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
