At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
