Is it because I queefed?
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
