I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
Randomize
