why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
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