That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
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