You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Randomize